The SUDC team sends a huge, warm hug to any parent or family member who is supporting a bereaved sibling.
Guide for Schools
SUDC UK has produced a booklet for primary and secondary schools, which offers guidance and recommendations to ensure bereaved brothers and sisters receive the emotional care they need.
Our guide book was produced in collaboration with bereaved parents who have children at both primary and secondary schools, as well as experts within education and trained counsellors.
An SUDC parent shared with us ‘As a primary school teacher it’s brilliant and as a mum hugely helpful, the language is carefully and gently worded and it feels accessible.’
This free school toolkit is available to order by emailing info@sudc.org.uk or a downloadable version is available by clicking the button below.
After an unexpected death it is normal to feel anxious and worried about your other children.
We understand that it is really normal to feel anxious and concerned for your other children after a sudden and unexpected death. Our team is here in understanding and support.
There is currently no evidence that using a monitor would prevent SUDC or guarentee the saftey of a child. However, some bereaved families tell us that the use of monitors helps them cope with anxiety with children of any age.
SUDC UK are not experts on monitors and have never tested any products. However, the following information on various types of monitors may feel helpful:
- The Lullaby Trust provides information on some of the different types of baby monitors available here.
- Young Epilepsy Charity provides information on monitor types here.
It may feel helpful to discuss monitors with the your doctor and we can connect you with other families affected by SUDC.
Family and Sibling Events
As part of SUDC UK’s services, we host supportive days out for the whole family. This is a great opportunity for parents and children alike to meet other SUDC families and connect. Discussing matters like supporting bereaved siblings with other parents who truly understand can be incredibly helpful.
An SUDC parent who attended one of our family days shared with us, ‘It really helps our son to know that there are other children who have lost siblings and they can still have fun and be happy’.
Please click here to find out about our family days.
We are here to help
SUDC UK understands how important support is for siblings and their families. Our co-founders have experience of sibling’s grief, counselling and speaking with schools, family screening and pregnancy following SUDC and would like you to know that you are not alone. We may be able to further advise in regards to resources and accessing help. Please feel free to contact us to arrange a supportive conversation over zoom or ask us any questions over email.
One SUDC dad, Tom, shared with us:
” There are times when we have frequent deep and difficult discussions with my son about his sister. These phases don’t often last for long; they’re heartbreaking but we always get through these times. Talking openly as a family seems to help. The nights can be tough and professional help has been incredibly useful. We had to speak to a few people to find the right ‘fit’ for our family and my son’s needs. After hard conversations with my son, we make it part of our routine that we each have a little piece of chocolate to help us transition back to discussing something different.”
Once you are fully registered, we also recommmend posting in the SUDC Foundation closed support groups for understanding and advice from other families who have experience supporting children affected by SUDC.
Other Support Organisations and Resources
Child bereavement UK – a huge array of resources for siblings, young people and schools. Support through Child Bereavement UK professionals may also be available.
Child Bereavement UK’s resources include an insightful video called ‘The invisible suitcase‘. They hope this video will ‘help children understand that their feelings are normal, and know that whilst grief is something that always stays with you, by reaching out for support it is something that you can learn to manage in your life’. Another video called ‘Puddle Jumping’ helps explain how children grieve differently from adults.
Winston’s Wish – a charity dedicated to support and resources for bereaved siblings.
Sibling Support – a charity offering advice, support and resources for bereaved siblings.
Parents can access a guide to help you navigate the complex process of grief with your children by clicking here.
Resources for parents and local support groups, some aimed at bereaved children.
Find local support for a sibling by visiting The Good Grief Trust or contact one of the national organisations listed below. Please contact us if you would like further advice or are struggling to find help.
Medicines for children – practical advice about medicines.
Medicines for Children is a partnership programme by the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health (RCPCH), Neonatal and Paediatric Pharmacists (NPPG) and WellChild.
Medical Alert Cards
Even mild illness can make families affected by Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood extremely anxious. If you would like to receive this informative, credit card size card to help support these difficult conversations with medical professionals please contact us. These cards were adapted from the SUDC Foundation version for use within the UK.
Siblings Attending Funerals
There is helpful information for parents on this subject from Winston’s Wish and Child Bereavement UK
Podcasts
Our wonderful patron, Jenni Thomas OBE (founder of Child Bereavement UK), has created a series of podcasts about Child Bereavement.
These are available from all podcast providers or directly from Jenni’s website and include various topics surrounding child bereavement, including unexplained death, children’s grief and supporting siblings. We are grateful for Jenni’s ongoing support of SUDC UK.
Books
Books can support a supportive resource for conversations with grieving children. SUDC UK has a small library of books we can share to help you choose a book which best suits your family. Please contact us to enquire. This book, Where are you Lydie? written by Emma Poore, is a beautiful example of one that you may find helpful. Other comprehensive booklists are available from Child Bereveament UK, Winston’s Wish and our patron, Jenni Thomas and the SUDC Foundation.